The Coin Toss: Heads for Friends, Tails For Lovers

    So, in a popular vote I was asked to blog about the particular topic of friends VS lovers. More specifically, the question went something along the lines of:

      "If you get along great with someone how do you know if you two are meant to only be friends, and not lovers? Its like you never know until you cross that line, then its to late. Yeeeah, id like some signs to look for that indicate someone is "friend only" material, and signs that someone has the potential to be more." 


    Before I  respond, I should mention I'M NO EXPERT IN MATTERS OF LOVE. I'm as lost as anyone that reaches into the darkness and hopes someone reaches back. However, I do have some thoughts on the matter.  I guess I should start with the word "meant." I don't believe people are "meant" to be friends or lovers; I believe we put people into these categories for whatever reason (and to our own detriment, sometimes the wrong reasons). Now, obviously there's a difference between friends and lovers but i've found the best long-term relationships are a lot like friendships. It's ironic how we divide the two so vehemently. If you're looking for signs, I don't know if they exist, except the obvious ones, like attraction. If two friends are attracted to each other, and get along great, there's no reason why they shouldn't be in a relationship. 
          
              Now, many people are worried about what happens if the relationship doesn't work out. Granted, things won't be the same, but that could also be a positive. I mean, if the two parties are honest with each other (and forgo the post-break up awkwardness) the friendship could be stronger than ever. I mean think about it, you'd know the person on practically every level. I think what it comes down to is honesty and maturity. Honesty about your feelings, and maturity to handle the fallout and mess that goes with relationships (hell, there's fallout and mess from friendships too). Who says we have to pick and choose? Great people are great people. For all intents and purposes friends are the best people to date, they also are the biggest risk. If you truly are friends, you should be open and honest about you're feelings. Dive in and see what happens. I mean you only live once, and it'd be a shame to miss a great opportunity over some silly code like, "I don't date friends." I said I was no expert in matters of love but none of us really are. Which is why we shouldn't be afraid of intimately connecting with the people we consider closest in our lives. If you're both mature enough to handle it, you'll both come out the better for it, no matter what happens.

A Rose by Any Other Name Would be just as Scaly

With the 2012 presidential election at the forefront of everyone’s mind let’s consider the cast of characters from the red team. Herman Cain (the Black one), Gary Johnson (the Liberal Republican), Fred Karger (the Gay one), Tom Miller (the non-politician, politician), Ron Paul (the old one,), Tim Pawlenty (Also known by his rap handle T-Paw), Mitt Romney (The Mormon, also the one who will run at the last minute), Rick Santorum  (the former senator, not the sexual byproduct) and Vern Wuensche (Go ahead and try to pronounce that last name). Who am I forgetting? Oh right, Newt Gingrich (the former Speaker of the house). Now, let’s forget about his qualifications for a moment; lets forget he was the 58^th speaker of the House of Representatives, let’s forget he was voted Time magazine’s person of the year in 1995 for leading the “Republican revolution,” successfully ending the rebel alliance (I mean the majority Democrats held in the house for forty years). Let’s forget all that, and talk about what really matters, his name.

Political differences aside, do American’s want a president named Newt? Granted, obscure presidential names seem to be trendy (thank you Mr Obama), Do Americans want a president named after a salamander? What’s worse, Newt Gingrich isn’t that far from being considered an actual salamander. Salamanders regenerate limbs, Newt Gingrich Regenerates marriages. Salamanders produce toxins to protect against predators, Newt Gingrich Shuts down the government (remember 1995 and 1996) when he feels threatened.  Salamanders are against Obama’s secular socialist machine and so is Newt. The similarities are uncanny; in fact, I think Newt Gingrich should be made to produce a birth certificate proving he’s not a salamander from the third dimension Salamandon. How else are Americans supposed to know the difference between viable candidates, socialists, and angry salamanders attempting a hostile take over after winning the 2012 elections? And if these Salamanders do take over, would they allow gay marriage? Or worse, would these salamanders attempt to overthrow the wholesome Christian values America was founded upon? Are they Muslim!!!! Certainly they’d be in favor of a privatized healthcare system, as they regenerate their own limbs. In any event, with so much variety in names, platforms, and species, 2012 promises to be an interesting election year.

On the Death Of Relationships

     How do you know when a relationship is dying? Not just a romantic relationship, any relationship. Like everything, relationships constantly change and evolve. Depending on the circumstances they become stronger or weaker. So how do you know when a relationship is dying? My personal belief is it starts with a balance shift. When a relationship dies, one person (or maybe no one) finds themselves more invested than the other. It's usually one person calling more than the other, or one person suggesting to hang more than the other. Secondly, the conversation shifts. No longer, is it the intimate conversations of old, now it's either a forced, or surface conversation, in any event, the dynamic changes. The most important indicator (in my opinion) is when you're reflecting mostly on the past, than on the future. For some reason, you reflect on how thing used to be, even if you  don't physically state it. I believe the philosopher Mick Jagger called it the "Memory Motel." I suppose the question is if there's anyway to save a dying relationship? I believe once a relationship gets to the point where it's dying there's no way to go back to the old relationship you remember, even if both parties are invested. Of course a relationship can evolve into something else, maybe something better, but never that moment of old. It's surreal, when you remember the relationships you used to have, and the people you used to know. They become "sweet memories" instead of living relationships. The truth is, when a relationship is dying, the interaction you've had has already become a memory and what you're left with is something else. "Changes fill my time and that's all right with me, in the midst I think of you and how it used to be." I guess when a relationship dies we need to let it or at least accept it. Like life, it's unhealthy to hold on to dead things.

A Psychedelic, Apocalyptic, Graduation

Graduation day brings many emotions, what comes to my mind is joy and anxiety. However, as we go on, let's remember a few things.

1. The fruit of life tastes like fear and hope.
2. We can't do anything about that.
3.Though we've graduated from college we may not be as ready for the "world" as we should be.
4. In the words of Hank Green, "we're not ending learning, just this one structure."
5. We'll grow beyond our specific majors and intended "plan for life."
6. Majors are bullshit, most of what we'll learn will come from our own curiosity.
7. Though were pushed out the nest of college, we'll soon fly to the next destination.
8. No matter if we're unemployed, have a job, or have no clue what the next step is, we have one life and we should live it bold and relentlessly. 

Apocalyptic Nightmare

      Why do Christian ministers never foresee an apocalypse involving, ya know, nuclear weapons, global warming, or some catastrophic environmental disaster? Furthermore, why is it always these ignorant old guys (like Harold Camping) who blame the gays for these events??? All I'm saying is when the Apocalypse doesn't happen May 21st (which came out of nowhere, i thought 2012 was the day) let's remember the real tragedy. Mainly, the ignorance that exists in our society which gives credence to loonies and not on legitimate issues.

Psychedelic Trip

Now, I won't go into how this came up, but does anyone have a GOOD reason why psychedelic drugs should remain illegal? Just curious......

On May Day and Osama Bin Laden

 Every year on May 1st the International Workers Holiday is celebrated. This year, I had the pleasure to attend the rally in New York City. Admittedly, I had no idea what May Day was until May 1st, when I found out from the Progressive Labor Party, the group I traveled with. Amidst the communist, anarchist, socialist, unionist etc I noticed we all had one thing in common, a desire to see a change in the world we live in. Each day, we complain about the shit we see on T.V, we complain about the wealth disparities, poverty, health care, and lack of human compassion. At the rally, I saw high-school kids, old men, old women, whites, blacks, and asians standing together for a common cause. Admittedly, the groups didn't all agree on the solution to the problem, but the one thing we did agree on is the criticism of an unabashed, exploitative-system. Apathy, is the biggest killer of revolution, ignorance, is the greatest friend of exploitation. It's great to see how well informed, passionate, people can come together.


On Osama Bin Laden

Everyone remembers where they were on september 11th, and to an extent, I believe we'll all remember where we were when Osama was killed. A ten year manhunt filled with miscalculations,mishandling, and misjudgments culminated with the death of Osama Bin Laden in Pakistan. Now, I think this has a negligible effect in the "War on Terror" but I do think it has a grand effect in the psyche of a nation and the world. We all lost something on September 11th, and though I do think the world is better without Osama, watching people come together over the death of a man while shouting "U.S.A, U.S A" is truly unsettling. Seal Team Six (the group who killed Osama) has a book deal, a movie deal etc...  I can't help but wonder why our culture deifies and demonizes, exalts and condemns people to "god's and devil's. Osama was many things -none the least a mass murderer- but he was also a misguided, misdirected, human being, who probably saw first hand the effects of imperialism and occupation. I'm certainly not defending the man, but lets remember he was a human (like us) that became so hate filled, he reacted. An analysis of the origin of this hate should be noted. In any event, the death of any human being shouldn't be reduced to the sophomoric chant "U.S.A, U.S.A" it should be treated with the solemnness, and severity of the events of september 11th, not a hollywood movie.

Yes I'm Racist!!!! But I'm not for Child labor!!!

Going to Howard University I can't help but feel a...... (how shall I put this)...... black theme, a racial theme. So, when it comes to questions of race, I think about it a lot. As I was reading the news, I came across the story of Paris Hilton. Paris was allegedly high on Ecstasy talking to some guy, found out he was black, and said, "Eww I don't do that sort of thing." I'm also assuming the room was dark and she couldn't tell he was Black (otherwise that's just weird). Now, I don't really care about Paris Hilton. Ignorant racist White girls are a dime a dozen, but it does bring up an interesting question. Are we all racist???? I don't think anyone Is really color blind. However, in this "post racial society" where race no longer matters, are we all just as racist as we were in the 50's?? I'm inclined to say yes. I think we all make small judgements based on race, or maybe assumptions. I think nobody is truly color blind, but then again, maybe I'm wrong. However, is a color blind society even preferential? What weird world would this be if we didn't acknowledge race?? I can imagine it now.

Police Man: Can you give me a description of the man?

Woman: Tall, with long hair.

Police man: Skin color?

Woman: Sorry officer!!! I don't see race.

Weird Indeed. Maybe the goal shouldn't be to eliminate race but to overcome it. Maybe we should be able to see a Black guy, recognize he's Black and move on. Maybe it's morally pretentious to think we don't make judgements based on race. YES, I do think your probably good at math if your asian (unless proved otherwise)YES, I do think if your last name's O'Connor, you like to drink, YES, I do think racial jokes are funny, and that's because there's a little bit of truth to them. However, that doesn't mean I want to go out and lynch people.  Like the song says, "maybe if we just admit, that we're all racist a little bit, and everyone stopped being so pc, maybe we could live in harmony."

From now on if someone asks, I'm saying, "Im 1/4 racist."

On Child Labor

So apparently the GOP wants to push some new laws in maine. These bills will in essence lax the states Child labor laws. the article reads


 "The first measure would let employers pay workers under the age of 20 a full $2.25 less per hour than Maine’s minimum wage for their first 180 days on the job. The bill would also eliminate the maximum number of hours a minor 16 years of age or older can work on a school day. The second would allow 16- and 17-year-old teenagers to work one hour later on school nights."

All I'm going to say is what the fuck republicans? Do you enjoy being evil? Do you really think you're for the American people? I think if their ever was a socialist revolution it'd be on the republicans watch. It's exactly thing like this that will force people out of apathy and to the streets.

Enough with the Fraternity&Sorority Bullshit..... Would you Rather??

   First off, let me start by saying there are many people in these organizations who aren't assholes. I'm just saying A LOT of these people are assholes. I'll also say i was on-line for a time, so I know a little bit about the inner workings (not a whole lot, but a little) of at least one group. Going to an HBCU (historically black college and university) the fraternity presence is somewhat noticeable. When I say that, I mean about 90%!!!!! (maybe that's an exaggeration but the numbers still high) of students want to join some form of fraternity; divine nine or otherwise. Now when asking the question, why do you want to join a fraternity? The unfailing answer is usually; to do community service, to join a brotherhood, a sisterhood, or something of that nature. Now of course community service and the bonds of brother and sisterhood existed long before the invention of "fraternities." My closest friends and I never pledged, but I suspect we're closer than a multitude of these organizations. However, it's shockingly suspect that I never hear the honest answers "To wear colors, to look cool, to get women, to yell on the yard, get in free to house parties, to boost my resume etc etc etc. THE REAL SHIT......and no, I have nothing against joining a fraternity for those reasons. In fact, I think that's more admirable than the facade of "community service." However, I do have a problem with the groupthink these organizations promote.  Since when is it cool to give up my identity to become what you envision a real man or woman is? Since when is it cool to be exclusive and elitist? Since when is it cool to throw a house party and charge 10 bucks for guys who aren't in the org.......(okay, admittedly that last one is cool). My point is, the people who cross these organizations have an identity change. Their life and the respective fraternity and sorority they've crossed are now combined. They loose a sense of individuality and now even wear fraternity colors on a regular basis (I cant tell you how many girls i've seen that only dress in the colors of their sorority). Of course I'm an outsider looking in, but to me, the outside image says enough with the fraternity and sorority bullshit.....


For all You Gamers


    When are they going to make a Metroid movie? The games been out for twenty years, is one of Nintendo's most popular titles and STILL NO MOVIE!!!! Maybe Nintendo is still recovering from Super Mario Brothers.

Would you rather


Go blind or never have an orgasm again? And I mean ever.... just putting it out there.