China or Chinatown USA?

Anyone ever see that Karate Kid movie? I mean the new one with Jaden Smith, not Ralph Maggio? Well, you should know that The New Karate kid is complete Bullshit. There are no other Black people in China. I am the only one, and if anyone says different, they're a lying prick.

If you haven't figured it out, I'm writing from china, which means that this whole enterprise of using Blogger is pretty fucking illegal. With that said, China isn't so different from the U.S. lets go down the list:

America

Consumed with Consumerism

China 

Consumed with Image

America

Hates poor people

China

Hates poor people

America

I drink too much

China

I drink too much

America 

Asians can't drive

China

Asians can't drive 

Yet, there are some differences that show the beauty of the two cultures

China 

No political dissension

America

A plethora of political options and opportunities

China 

Ethnocentric

America

Warm and accepting to every culture ever

You get the idea. 

In any event, the morale of today's story is that if a random person approaches you to  go to a tea shop, she's trying to take your money...all of your money. Now THAT'S an ancient Chinese Secret.

 P.S. I'm not the only Black person here. There are like 10 Nigerians somewhere. 

Blogs Are Bullshit

Blogs are bullshit. Perhaps a true testament to a culture obsessed with self-promotion, self-aggrandizement and self proclamation. Only a "Myspace generation" would take a self reflecting practice, put it online and pray to the internet gods to make them famous. This I imagine is what many people want for their blogs. To become the next Perez Hilton or whoever the fuck. With that said, I am not above any of the aforementioned things. However, my intent is to improve my writing and legitimately express myself, while gaining valuable feedback. It's also a test of endurance. Let us see if I can regularly update and write a blog.

The Man Named Ernest

Ernest is a drunken fellow who stumbled into my apartment today. As stated earlier, he was a sloppy drunk who made a habit of falling (he fell twice on the floor). Being home alone, I originally thought my mother had entered the apartment and for all intents and purposes, fell on the floor. To my surprise, it was an elderly man who insisted he knew my mom, "Do you know Yvonne?" Until questioned a second time, "Are you sure you know Yvonne?" where he changed his mind completely. "I'm so embarrassed, I think I'm in the wrong house." I responded, " You may be right buddy." Ernest then proceeded to offer me candy (I'm serious). This made the situation a bit more peculiar. Anyway, the lesson of today's story is: Lock your doors, but if you happen to be the one who stumbles onto unfamiliar territory bring candy.